Focus group - Indian style

Rein checking in -

"Today I joined Simon to APSA to help conduct a final fact finding session for his Women Self Help Group Impact Study. It was (supposed to be) a focus group with ten ladies from different SHG's to ask them some open questions about their experience as a SHG member.

We drove off on our scooter to the APSA campus in the morning where we were supposed to be met by a coordinator to take us to the place where the focus group would be held. On our way we were pulled over by the police (ok, we were going down a separated carriage way on the wrong side of the road, but as this appears to be common practice here we assumed this was no big deal).  As I was the driver, Simon jumped off the bike and I quickly handed him my wallet miming at him to empty it of all the money in it. We were warned by friends that it is best to have an empty wallet when dealing with the police in case they want its full contents as bakshis. The police officer turned to me and asked for my Indian driver's license. I stammered that I left it at home and that I thought what I did was OK as I was just following all the other drivers doing the same (in fact there was even a car driving up the wrong side of the ramp, so I wasn't even lying). The officer clearly didn't care much for having to deal with a foreigner so just grunted at me to produce 200 rupees (about € 3.25) and he'd let me off the hook.  For locals that would a big amount, but I gladly took the opt-out and quickly pulled the notes from my pocket. Relieved we got away with it we continued on our way to APSA.

When we arrived we found that nobody was there to take us or even knew about the focus group, so Simon rang around a few of his colleagues and finally got some directions where to go. We set out again and after a bit of searching we finally got to the meeting place, only about an hour or two late. True to Indian hospitality, we were assured that this was no problem at all. Our host insisted on making us chai and letting us relax before we were taken to the ladies. After a refreshing cup of tea and some polite chit chat we were finally taken to the group. As these are all self employed women it was best to go to their huts in the slum to do the focus group.

When we got there they managed to pull out the only two chairs in the whole slum for us and quickly the community gathered around us curious to see what us two gora's where up to... Our host operated as the translator and we quickly started the process.

At first the ladies hesitantly answered our questions but soon the whole community joined in with their opinions about the subject, regardless of their knowledge or experience with the self-help group. I asked the questions, our translator translated (when he wasn't busy recording the whole process on his photo camera) and Simon dutifully tried to write down the answers, while we both knew we weren't getting any real new insights from the responses, but boy did everyone enjoy the process. As did we!

In the end I realised, once again, that the journey was more important than the destination. Clearly the benefit of conducting this focus group wasn't in the information we were gathering. Instead it was in the fact that we were there, showing an interest in these ladies and what they were achieving through the SHG, thus validating their feeling of significance and self-worth. After we thanked them for their contributions we left them feeling energised and happy about the exercise in the thought that we had helped them a small step further in their growing self confidence.

I now also realise how often we forget about the true benefit of the work we do in the Western world, focusing too much on producing a pre-defined result or outcome and thus missing out on a lot of potential value-add.

I hope I will be able to think back of this important lesson when I pick up my career at the other end of this sabbatical."

- Rein checking out

A different season, a different tune...

Rein checking in -

"It's been ages since we last blogged... In the meantime we've had the visit of our dear friend, Françoise, went on a holiday with her to Kerala, "God's own Country" as the Keralites like to call their state and had a really good time.

Now we're back at home in Bangalore, where there's been rain, rain, rain every day for the last week or so. The locals insist, this cannot be the beginning of the monsoon yet, as it is not due to arrive until another month or two, but S. and I cannot be fooled. Climate change appears to be effecting this part of the globe too, and of course it would. Every morning we wake up to a cloudy sky, we get some sun between mid morning to about 3 afternoon and then the rain clouds come drifting in again. This morning we read in the papers there have been 8 rain related deaths in Bangalore over the last five days alone...

Yesterday we came home from a nice day trip in the country side surrounding the city with our friend and housemate, Yann, and got caught in a tropical downpour on the way back into the city. Roads were blocked, spontaneous cascades were forming along alleys in the city and finally our driver managed to navigate us safely through knee-deep water back home. I cannot remember ever seeing so much water on the streets ever...

It appears that the change of seasons here is also effecting our moods. Simon keeps wondering the sense of swapping cloudy Brussels for rainy Bangalore and I too have been questioning our purpose for being here.

We are now considering our next step and are both keen to move on with our sabbatical.

As I have been writing this, on our terrace, I was joined by our new housemate, Floy, from Paris. She's been here several times before, working on a movie project about the local hijra (or transgender) community. We started chatting and she invited me to join her to yoga class tomorrow afternoon. She suggests that tapping into the more spiritual flow which is all around us here in India, will help in living more in the here-and-now and also to redefine the purpose of our sabbatical. I think it is a good idea and that it will help us to decide on our next step. Here's hoping for new energy..."

- Rein checking out

PS here are some pics from the last two weeks, just to keep our loyal followers happy ;-)

Showing Françoise around on our bike!

Having fun on our house boat trip in Kerala

Taking the local bus in Bangalore

On the beach in Varkala, with resident visitor, Maura, from Amsterdam

A reflection on our experience so far

Rein checking in -

This was in fact a draft article I wrote to be included in the Better Future newsletter. As my latest blog post won over this one, it didn't make it to the newsletter. However, I still felt it was worth keeping (even if only for my own memory's sake) so I am adding it to the blog. I can't remember exactly when I wrote it, but I think it fits here nicely, time-wise. Hope you enjoy it...

"It was a hot summer's day on top of a hill in the French Provence in July 2010 that the concept of taking a sabbatical came to us. We were on a holiday, so had had some time to reflect on our professional life and how (un)fulfilling it was or had become. 

For me, after almost 25 years of being what people call a "professional" I felt I was at a dead end and not sure where to find a source of energy to keep me going for the next 25 years. I had recently been looking around for new job opportunities, with mixed success, and started to realise that I needed a step change rather than just another "professional" position in another corporate environment.

It was in fact Simon who planted the seed for our joint sabbatical, casually mentioning during our hike: "what if we just packed everything up and spent some time 'up North' (in Australia)?”. I recall the rush of excitement with the idea that went through my body thinking about spending some time there. Having spent 6 years of my life "Down-Under", and returning to visit friends and family every 2 years, I always feel like I'm coming home when I arrive and I feel most happy when I'm visiting the outback. There is some kind of special energy emanating from the earth there that always fills me with positivity and happiness. To be there for an extended period of time, without the pressure of returning to work after a holiday, would truly be amazing.

So the concept stuck. When we got back home after our vacation that summer I shared my intention with friends and (trusted) colleagues. They universally commented on the excitement and positive energy with which I spoke about this idea, in spite of its potentially far reaching practical implications. Their feedback in turn confirmed my gut feel and so I started exploring the practicalities of actually doing "it": taking some time off from work to explore new horizons, exposing myself to new experiences and to truly be open to unexpected opportunities, without being constrained by obligations and commitments.

This exploration had both an encouraging and sobering effect. Encouragement for example in the discovery that Belgium, where I was employed at the time, offers a social scheme in terms of common employee rights to facilitate taking up to 12 months unpaid leave from work. And a lot of sobering practicalities, such as having to give up our lovely (rented) apartment in Brussels, all the conveniences that come with employment (such as an income!) and visas to be able to enter and be active in the countries which we wish to visit.

Nonetheless, by September I discussed my intentions with my employer and set a date for the sabbatical year to start. The following months saw me go through several ups and downs in working through the preparations of the year ahead. It felt like slowly undoing a life that took 25 years to build and I realised that the mental process that goes with a sabbatical had already begun. Three key lessons presented themselves very clearly for me to learn: 1) learning to let go; to let go of structure and security that provide an (often false) sense of control but also to let go of precise expectations as to be truly open to the new and unexpected; 2) daring to go with the flow; having a sense of trust in the unknown and in your own capability to make the best of what comes your way and finally 3) patience, patience, patience; destiny doesn’t  appear overnight, it takes learning and growth to realise what your destiny is and for this one needs to live the journey as it unfolds instead of being too focused on its destination.

In essence, these three lessons seem simple and in fact quite obvious. But it took me to make a conscious decision to step out of the rat race I was living to become aware of their value for my own growth and development. Now, for over four months, I am living the journey of my sabbatical which, on our way to Australia, has taken me here to Bangalore, where I have been able to gain new experiences and contribute as a volunteer with the Spastics Society of Karnataka as well as Better Future and not a day goes past that I am not reminded of my three lessons to learn."

- Rein checking out

GOA - a heavenly getaway

Simon signing in -

After returning today, it is very hard to try get back into the swing of things. Goa, where to start. It was an amazing get away in one of the most beautiful places on earth (from my recollection to date).

We left Saturday evening on the sleeper bus with the knowledge of our 12 hour trip. This would have been our longest trip in a sleeper bus, but hey, we enjoyed the comfort of the last and this did not put us off. Well, spoke too soon. You see, the last bus was a state run bus, and this one, private, and they liked to 'pack em in'. The sleeping berths were substantially smaller than the last, but at least Rein and I shared one. Our friend, Yann, had to share with a 'large' fellow who took all the space and who kept most the bus up with his bear like snore.

Our Life Guards....literally, we were the only ones there!

Arriving in Goa Sunday morning we were a little exhausted and ready to again see our friends. A short auto-rickshaw ride found us on a secluded beach called Agonda. On first sight, the beach huts where we were to stay looked a little run down but on closer inspection we found a most incredible beach.

The huts and restaurant are ON THE BEACH. With less than a 20 second walk you had your feet in the most beautiful sea water. We all like immediately.





Our friends had arrived a few days earlier and when they found out we would be also coming they arranged the booking of our huts. Ours was the front one viewing directly the beach.

I'm happy to have arrived.

The huts were simple yet clean and offered all we needed. The restaurant too was simple, yet provided food all day long and for 95% of the time, this restaurant was all ours. All this was charged at around 6€ per night. SIX!

Our hut on the beach...fabulous.

Agonda is located in the south of the State of Goa. They have around five known tourist beaches but Agonda surely is the last to be really hit by the tourists. The beach looks out over the Arabian sea which is a part of the Indian Ocean, the ocean I  grew up on. It felt strange to be in another country viewing the ocean of my home.

We settled into our hut and immediately set about getting comfy in our new short term home. Again, there was barely 25 other people on the beach and perhaps in the entire time it peaked to about 50 (for the entire beach). The peak tourist time too had gone and they were mostly waiting for what tourists there were left to leave so as to close down for the season.

My seat for four days

I can also say that although we were there for three nights and four full days, we mainly just sat on a chair, swam in the ocean, lounged on a bed or enjoyed fresh fish and seafood. Heaven.

We did manage a day or two on bikes whereby we visited some of the other toursit beaches which when we saw them, we knew we had chosen the best. In fact, Palolem Beach, just next to ours (yet on the other side of a huge mountain like cliff) aparently looked just like Agonda only five years before. We were shocked. How could a beach become so commercial in such a short time. It was very sad, though we have seen in several places at how quickly India is growing, expanding, merging to become the country it is today. I fear for what has happened in Europe with its many famous tourist locations that once upon a time were also idylic places which are now crowded and charge the earth.

PACKED PALOLEM

Another location, we visited one of the former Portuguese forts on a cliff top. From there we viewed an incredible beach which was deserted. Right, we were onto that. And indeed, it was. It involved a little climb down, but once there, it was ours.

First sunset on Agonda

I had always heard of Goa and imagined a place where hippies go and die, where parties, drinking, drugs and anything else would be rampant and well, I guess it is there, but what I found was a place where you can just sit, swim and relax and be safe in the knowledge that you get the best sunset everyday of the week.

Our lounges

All in all our trip to Goa was amazing. We loved catching up with our friends again (albeit we only met them three weeks ago!) as we all get on great. We all had great chats, laughs, swims and quiet time. Goa is one place I would gladly add onto any future travel itinerary and I recommend anyone to visit, though keep the beach name to yourselves as I would not want it spoiled by too many tourists!! :-)

Dinner under the stars.

Our last sunset.